Marriage Equality

Quote of the Day:  This is the day that the Lord has caused to evolve. Let us rejoice. Pastor Andy Smith at the funeral of one of his colleagues Len Anderson, a man who lived through the Civil Rights movement, women being ordained as Lutheran ministers, and the ELCA vote to allow openly gay pastors to be ordained, and remain in the ministry. Pastor Len Anderson lived his life with an open mind and a caring heart. He showed us that the world is constantly evolving. Old beliefs and prejudices can disappear as we replace them with new ones that allow people to live out their lives the way God made them.

On August 1, 2013, the state of Minnesota saw its first legal same sex marriages. My friend Joey Halvorson captured many of the local weddings as a photographer. Her photo, and the stories of women I've met, inspired me to write an article for our local women's magazine, Her Voice. My article, "6 Brides" starts on p. 32. Our local UCC church celebrated a triple wedding last August for six brides who waited many years to become legally wed. I'd like to thank all the contributors to this article. You are all brave, strong, and inspiring. 

Photo by Joey Halvorson

Photo by Joey Halvorson

I spent many hours on this article interviewing wedding officiants, the brides, friends, and community members. Of course, the writing took some time, too, as I had to keep all that great information down to an 800 word article. The above photos are from a group interview that we held at our local coffee shop, The Coco Moon. We pushed two tables together to accommodate a powerhouse of women who wanted to share their stories with me and the readers of my blog and Her Voice. Joey's photo in the article will be displayed at the Minnesota Historical Society. 

Be strong and brave in who you are. Your courage will inspire others.

Go. Create. Inspire!

Journaling Prompt:  Describe a time when you felt called upon to do something brave.

Threats of Violence

Quote of the Day:  Violence and the threat of violence is around us every day.  I tried googling that statement to see if I should give a quote credit to an individual, but found many, many articles on violence, from the recent shooting in Arizona, to domestic violence right here in our back yard, and the continued nation-wide violence across the globe.

Just this week, our local Y had a bomb scare.  My young sons were in the pool at their normal swim practice.  I'd sent my oldest son to pick them up and drop off his other brother.  And, where was the Mother? (they always ask that in media interviews)  I was at home having a happy piano lesson with two of my neighbor girls.  I'd sent my sons off into a potential danger zone.  Now, I'm not as paranoid as that sounds.  I realize that most of the bomb threats are done by kids wanting attention.  My oldest son wanted to "poo poo" my worries.  I said, "Listen, I know it's not probable, but it IS possible.  Do you think your friend in Omaha ever thought that a school shooting would happen where she lives?"  He said, "Good point."  I thanked him.  All I need to know is that they understand that danger IS out there.  It can happen anywhere at any time.  It doesn't matter where you live or how many times you been somewhere.  This could be the day that violence strikes.

Two days later, while I was driving home from the Y after dropping off one of my sons, I hit a deer.  It wasn't far from where I hit one last year.  Killed it, just like last year, and the damage to the vehicle looks about the same.  Last year, I hit one in the morning, just before the sun came up.  This year, just after the sun went down.  You never know when something will pop out of the darkness and scare you half to death.  Luckily, a friend and work-out buddy from the Y, stopped her car and stayed with me until the cops checked out the situation, and she followed me home.  I am grateful for my girlfriend who helped, but when her car stopped, I didn't know who would be coming out to "help."  It could also have been someone who would harm me. 

I remind my kids to shut and lock doors when they leave the house, especially when I'm not home.  I need to remind them that I am a vulnerable woman.  Women are victims of violence every day - Every Single Day - around the world, and yes, right here in our own back yard.

They say that Superbowl Sunday is one of the worst days in the USA for domestic violence.  If you sense danger as testosterone and tempers escalate, make a plan.  Leave the house, leave town, seek shelter from a friend, family member, or your local women's shelter.  You are not alone, and there are people out there who will help you.  Trust your intuition.  If something doesn't feel right, seek help.  We have this "Hollywood" image of what spousal abuse looks like - it's bruises and kicks and broken bones, but that's just when it's escalated to its peak.  It can also be name calling, insults, cruel teasing, hissing criticisms in your ear, the silent treatment, demanding his way, the threat of violence by slamming doors, breaking things, talking about guns and shooting.  Isolation.

We live in a world of violence and the threat of violence.  We must remain ever vigilant.  We need to trust our instincts. 

Be strong. Be safe.  So that you can Go, Create, and Inspire others.

Peace,
Mary

Journaling Prompt:  Write about a time when your instincts helped you in a situation.

The Heart is Willing but the Resistence is Great

Quote of the Day:  Writing is harder than anything else; at least starting to write is.  It's much easier to was dishes.  When I'm writing I set myself a daily quota of pages, but nine times out of ten I'm doing those pages at four o'clock in the afternoon because I've done everything else first...But once I get flowing with it, I wonder what took me so long.  - Kristin Hunter, American writer

I chose this picture for the summer feeling (it's below 0 here today), and because I brought a few of these handmade journals to my mom's group on Monday.

Peace!

Last week, I wrote about Bucket Lists.  My new adult piano student and I both received wonderful comments and encouragement from that post.  One of her friends wrote, "I want to be a Kindergartner in something.  I just don't know what."  We make our lists.  We have our dreams.  We might even know exactly what we love to do and where we'd like to go with it.  And, yet, there is resistence.

On Monday, my Faithful Moms group wanted to talk and write about Bucket Lists, New Year's Resolutions, Word for the Year, and Dreams.  We met at 8:30 am.  First, we chatted a bit, catching up on the week.  Then, we watched a Youtube video of Dr. Martin Luther King's "I Have a Dream" speech.  He really was a powerful speaker.  One mom said, "He really knew how to work a metaphor."  I wondered if he wrote his own speeches.  Then, we talked about Civil Rights, looked up info on Dr. King, talked about our kids, what we would do "once they're out of the house."  And, on and on.  It was almost 10:00, the time we usually wrap it up, and I said, "Okay, time to turn off the computer.  Shut it down.  Stop talking and write."  I had to use my teacher/mom voice with these women.  The resistence in the room was thick like goo. (Those were the first words I wrote in my journal.)

Don't we all do that?  We want to do our art, or learn a new craft, or save money for a trip...anything.  But, we fuss around "doing dishes" instead of the task that's calling us.  And, like Kristin Hunter, in the above quote, I do the same thing.  I clean, start laundry, putter around, check my email, look at facebook, play the piano for a bit, even take a walk, THEN I'm ready to sit down and write.  Of course, by then the kids are home from school and the first piano student is at the door.

I challenge you to ignore the dishes, turn off the internet, and dig into your craft/goals today.  You can do it.  It's a bit like exercise, I know.  At first you avoid it, but when you're done, you feel so good about yourself.

Go. Create. Inspire!  (and, stop resisting!!!)

Journaling Prompt:  What would you rather be doing right now?

The Power of the Purse

Quote of the Day:  Know what you have and where it is. Laurie Fitterer, my financial advisor

I write for our local women's magazine, called Her Voice.  I love that title.  I found my voice by getting published in Her Voice.  In my most recent article, The Power of the Purse, I encourage women to fully understand their financial status.  If you'd like to read the article, click here.  It is on p. 32 & 33.  Click on the text to enlarge it.

I feel especially proud of this article because I used to be one of those women who gave away her power over money.  My husband earned the money, had control over the money, and worked at a bank.  In part, I believed he had better knowledge of where to invest it.  In part, he liked having the control.  When we got divorced, I had anxiety about figuring out what I had and where it was, and needing to do it under great emotional strain.  I went from knowing very little, to understanding my investments.

Laurie advises us to know who is on our professional team, attorney, accountant, banker, etc.  Don't wait until a crisis occurs to find out who they are and try to figure out what you have.  If you're single, find out the best way to use your money.  Develop a relationship with these professionals, and never believe that you need to talk yourself into trusting someone.  If you have a bad feeling about someone, find a different person to help you.  You always have options.

Money and finances are important for all adults to understand.  I don't think any of us got enough education on this as we were pushed out into the world.  Laurie said that most college students get bombarded with credit card offers and quickly get into trouble.  Be money smart, and never give away all the power over your purse.

Journaling Prompt:  Write about money.